Reasons why I hate Bill Walton
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I hate this guy. I mean, just look at his smug face.
He's a walking advertisement for himself. He constantly drops Grateful Dead references; and when you drop Dead lyrics as often as he does, you know he's doing it consciously to create his public persona. He loves talking about big men and how they play the game--which is fine because he's arguably the greatest all-around center of all time--but not without mentioning his foot injury at every single opportunity (primary reason, according to Dr. Jack Ramsey, why he's arguably the greatest all-around center of all time). He loves to talk about John Wooden and Larry Bird and about "greatness." Though he appears to be humbling himself by basking in their reflected glory (being Wooden's player and Bird's teammate), you get the feeling, from the way he talks about them, that he unabashedly considers himself as their equal. Sure he IS a HOFer and probably closer to these great basketball personas than 98% of people in the world, but he straddles the wall and blows both ways: you just cannot be humble and haughty at the same time and reap the benefits of both.
The way he talks about basketball in general is also really irksome to me. He loves to take the old-school stance, extolling the virtues of pick-and-roll, teamwork, passing, work ethic, "making teammates better," etc. (while inevitably namedropping John Wooden--"I remember when I was under the tuteledge of Coach Wooden..."). But he also takes David Stern's party line and panders (well, cock-sucks is more like it) to the superstars, the Kobes and the McGradys and the Iversons, whose games are more Jordan than team. In the same paragraph/broadcast, he can go from praising the shoot-out style of the 04 Sonics (currently 17-3) as "free-flowing" and condemn the same shoot-out style of the 02 Celtics (led by Toine and Pierce, lost in the conf. semis by shooting <30%) as "unimaginative." Basically, Bill Walton will say either 1) what the fans want to hear or 2) what the NBA thinks the fans should hear.
Which is fine, if he stays true to being the NBA's loudspeaker. But he also shamelessly fancies himself as a journalist. What with his trademarked alliterative cheese like the "What grace, what atheleticism, what determinations, what ball-humming bullshit XXXX" variety, or his use of intelligent-sounding, but needlessly and meaninglessly superfluous phrasing like
This guy just really piss me off. Fucking hypocritical cock-sucker. I think I have to side with Ralph Lawlor on this one.
He's a walking advertisement for himself. He constantly drops Grateful Dead references; and when you drop Dead lyrics as often as he does, you know he's doing it consciously to create his public persona. He loves talking about big men and how they play the game--which is fine because he's arguably the greatest all-around center of all time--but not without mentioning his foot injury at every single opportunity (primary reason, according to Dr. Jack Ramsey, why he's arguably the greatest all-around center of all time). He loves to talk about John Wooden and Larry Bird and about "greatness." Though he appears to be humbling himself by basking in their reflected glory (being Wooden's player and Bird's teammate), you get the feeling, from the way he talks about them, that he unabashedly considers himself as their equal. Sure he IS a HOFer and probably closer to these great basketball personas than 98% of people in the world, but he straddles the wall and blows both ways: you just cannot be humble and haughty at the same time and reap the benefits of both.
The way he talks about basketball in general is also really irksome to me. He loves to take the old-school stance, extolling the virtues of pick-and-roll, teamwork, passing, work ethic, "making teammates better," etc. (while inevitably namedropping John Wooden--"I remember when I was under the tuteledge of Coach Wooden..."). But he also takes David Stern's party line and panders (well, cock-sucks is more like it) to the superstars, the Kobes and the McGradys and the Iversons, whose games are more Jordan than team. In the same paragraph/broadcast, he can go from praising the shoot-out style of the 04 Sonics (currently 17-3) as "free-flowing" and condemn the same shoot-out style of the 02 Celtics (led by Toine and Pierce, lost in the conf. semis by shooting <30%) as "unimaginative." Basically, Bill Walton will say either 1) what the fans want to hear or 2) what the NBA thinks the fans should hear.
Which is fine, if he stays true to being the NBA's loudspeaker. But he also shamelessly fancies himself as a journalist. What with his trademarked alliterative cheese like the "What grace, what atheleticism, what determinations, what ball-humming bullshit XXXX" variety, or his use of intelligent-sounding, but needlessly and meaninglessly superfluous phrasing like
"It is the play-making ability of Allen Iverson thatA player's play-making ability makes him valuable to a team? No shit? Of course most TV sports personas (to be distinguished from sports writers) are guilty of unnecessary bullshit fillers (how many time have you heard T.H.E. N.A.T.I.O.N.A.L. F.O.O.T.B.A.L.L. L.E.A.G.U.E. instead of NFL on SportsCenter?) but Walton is the most gratuitous of the bunch. Not only that, he probably considers himself Emmy-worthy. Sure he's no literary giant, which is probably why he ALWAYS start his columns with Grateful Dead lyrics.
makes him so important to 76er's offense" (quoted from
ESPN chat 12/13/04)
This guy just really piss me off. Fucking hypocritical cock-sucker. I think I have to side with Ralph Lawlor on this one.
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